Controversial Relationship Blog

Tag: comedy

Tom Cruise wants to eat you

Finding Mr. Right in the Zombie Apocalypse

Since the Zombie Apocalypse is upon us, we ladies must re-evaluate what to look for in a Mr. Right. You want to be partnered with the best man possible when zombies attack. According to a 2009 University of Ottawa analysis, an outbreak of even slow zombies like those staggering around in Night of the Living Dead … Read More ›

103382_gal

“World War Z” is an Epic Failure

World War Z is a predictable, clichéd film that—with the exception of piles of cheesy CGI zombies—we’ve seen before.  Stars Brad Pitt as a retired UN Inspector charged with saving the world after almost everyone turns into a zombie because UN inspectors do more than check for chemical weapons. Brad has to be forced out… Read More ›

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6 Hairstyles Guaranteed To NOT Get A Man To Notice You

I came across a beauty article about “the hairstyles that get guys to notice you”. Naturally, the hairstyles were:  long hair, long hair in a pony tail, long hair with loose curls, long hair with tight curls and long shiny hair. Okay, I think we get that guys like long hair, but what don’t they… Read More ›

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Start The New Year With Gwyneth Paltrow And Explosive Diarrhea

Actress Gwyneth Paltrow has her own website called “Goop”. She refers to it as “an eminent lifestyle publication, dedicated to informing and positively inspiring its audience.” Its purpose is to help you “save time, simplify and feel inspired” through her ridiculous suggestions about stuff you can’t possibly afford. Here are Goop’s Categories of Interest: Be, Do,… Read More ›

Butt implant

This Week’s Most Horrifying Things Seen on the Internet

I think I should start featuring the most horrifying things I’ve seen on the Internet each week. This first item is weird and creepy, but hey, why have  calendar of boring, hot babes in bikinis when you can have this? It’s a calender of dental mannequins dressed in clothes and put in normal situations. And… Read More ›

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“Review” of Lindsay Lohan’s Comeback Movie “Dick and Liz”

Dick and Liz aka Diz and Lick, starring Lindsay Lohan premiered Sunday. It is the story of the tumultuous love affair between Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton. They were both married when they met and fell in love during the filming of Cleopatra in 1963.  Diz and Lick has plenty of screaming, pouting, sighing, boozing, bad acting, and… Read More ›

Nana Gouvea Meme1

Showcase Your Modeling Talents During a Natural Disaster

Why let a good disaster go to waste? NY City resident Nana Gouvea took full advantage of Hurricane Sandy’s wreckage by sexily posing amidst downed trees, destroyed cars, and wrecked buildings. Now I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking how could she do this when people have died in this hurricane; people have lost everything they… Read More ›

Dude

The Man Translator: What He’s Really Thinking

Men and women think so differently it’s no wonder we have constant miscommunication. We truly speak a different language. What’s needed is some kind of translator, like Google has for foreign languages, so I’ve created The Man Translator. It takes what a woman says and translates it to what he hears her saying with his… Read More ›

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Living In The Zombie Apocalypse

The CDC wants you to be prepared for the upcoming zombie apocalypse, which is almost upon us. Their explanation for using zombies is to “spice up our general preparedness message.” (Because tornadoes and earthquakes aren’t sexy. Zombies are.)             Once the zombies have arrived in your area, what should you do? Forget… Read More ›

catlady

And We Have Another Future Crazy Cat Lady…

I don’t understand why women are putting their requirements for a man on the Internet. Shouldn’t this be a private, secret list you tuck away in your lingerie drawer? What men do they think are reading these requirements? Do they actually think amazing guys are surfing the web, reading the demands, becoming entranced, and then are… Read More ›

blowing-man

The Best Of Staked: One of My Online Dates from Hell

His profile title was “Catch of a Lifetime”. He was a doctor in his 40s.      The doctor wanted to meet at a bar that served his favorite booze:  Tata’s vodka. He raved about it, explaining in  detail it was distilled six times. (Isn’t Moonshine??) He boasted how he obtained a bottle signed by the great Tata himself. He… Read More ›

perv head

Three Hot Chicks on Porn Review XXX “Peeping Tom”

The Three Hot Chicks on Porn review  the 1940s vintage XXX sex film “Peeping Tom.” The nine minute film is black and white and has no sound. It is set to Looney Tunes sounding music. The Three Hot Chicks are: Carolina of Staked in the Heart La La of Tales of a Charm City Chick… Read More ›