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Does This Belt of Explosives Make Me Look Fat?

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March 28, 2016

Al Qaeda has published a new terrorist magazine in English. What’s its name? This Week in Death to America? The Popular Jihadist? Kaboom? No, it’s called Palestine, as if it’s the ultimate insiders’ guide to Palestinian culture, recipes, travel and events, like California Living. Claiming it “focuses on the raw emotions of  the victim hood in the Muslim world,” the… Read More ›

Steven Avery’s Dumbass Supporters Have Some Explaining to Do

After the airing of the documentary, “Making a Murderer” about the Teresa Halbach murder,  thousands of people signed petitions demanding Steven Avery, and his 16 yr old mentally deficient nephew, Brendan Dassey get a new trial. I’m giving these misguided people the benefit of the doubt and assuming they just didn’t know all the evidence. To… Read More ›

Do-Gooder Gets Harsh Reality Check From Syrian Refugees

I read an article recently by a do-gooder in one of the Syrian refugee centers. She was “excited” to start “helping the refugees” and signed up to volunteer. Now she’s discovered instead of welcoming grateful families into her loving embrace, she’s fighting off nasty, violent, demanding men. These rapefugees sexually harass her and threaten to behead volunteers when they’re given the bad… Read More ›

The New Class of Slave in America

A few hundred years ago we brought Africans over and made them our slaves.  America gets bashed repeatedly for its history of slave owning, but slavery had been around for thousands of years before America existed. We thought we abolished slavery in the 1800s, but it turns out we really didn’t. We have a modern… Read More ›

The Buffoonery of Ebola

Unless you’ve been living on another planet you’ve heard about the deadly Ebola virus. The media keeps showing us this same picture like it’s a Wanted poster. This is how we’re going to stop Ebola’s spread, by each of us being on constant look-out for the blue stained spaghetti. Whenever we’re perusing tiny stuff with… Read More ›

Start The New Year With Gwyneth Paltrow And Explosive Diarrhea

Actress Gwyneth Paltrow has her own website called “Goop”. She refers to it as “an eminent lifestyle publication, dedicated to informing and positively inspiring its audience.” Its purpose is to help you “save time, simplify and feel inspired” through her ridiculous suggestions about stuff you can’t possibly afford. Here are Goop’s Categories of Interest: Be, Do,… Read More ›

Meth Ain’t a Beauty Product

I’ve never tried meth because, honestly, it never interested me. Looking at this collection of meth addict mug shots taken at different ages, I’m glad I haven’t. These are gruesome. If I were shown these horrible pics as a teen, I wouldn’t have gone near the stuff. (Not that I did anyway.) Without meaning to… Read More ›

This Week’s Most Horrifying Things Seen on the Internet

I think I should start featuring the most horrifying things I’ve seen on the Internet each week. This first item is weird and creepy, but hey, why have  calendar of boring, hot babes in bikinis when you can have this? It’s a calender of dental mannequins dressed in clothes and put in normal situations. And… Read More ›

The Wacky Petraeus Love Pentagon Explained

There are so many players in the unfolding soap opera of the General Petraeus sex scandal that I decided to straighten them out. It’s confusing trying to keep track of who was sending what threatening and/or lurid email to whom. It all started when General Petraeus had an affair with the biographer of his book… Read More ›

Showcase Your Modeling Talents During a Natural Disaster

Why let a good disaster go to waste? NY City resident Nana Gouvea took full advantage of Hurricane Sandy’s wreckage by sexily posing amidst downed trees, destroyed cars, and wrecked buildings. Now I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking how could she do this when people have died in this hurricane; people have lost everything they… Read More ›

Three Hot Chicks On Porn – Review “Another Night in Chyna”

This is the first official sex tape review for The Three Hot Chicks on Porn. They are: Carolina of Staked in the Heart, La La of Tales of a Charm City Chick, Maggie We chose “Another Night in Chyna” featuring WWE wrestler and reality TV star Chyna (Joanie Laurer) and her boyfriend, X-Pak (Sean Waltman), another… Read More ›