Not A Safe Space

12 Reasons Why Game of Thrones Was Butchered !

SPOILER ALERT

Game of Thrones has consistently delivered an outstanding show with great drama, compelling characters and amazing special effects.

Until now.

It’s been going downhill in Season 8, and is officially in the toilet. The last two episodes, 5 and the Finale were the worst.

 

GoT became plot driven instead of character driven. This means the characters do whatever inane thing in furtherance of the plot rather than what is natural for them.

Let’s review some highlights from the extreme suckage that was “The Bells” . So awful, it’s rated 47% on Rotten Tomatoes. https://www.rottentomatoes.com/tv/game-of-thrones/s08/e05:

The snoozefest that was the fight between Urine Greyjoy and Jaime. Urine, the discount Jack Sparrow, and Jaime encounterrrr…….oh, sorry I dozed off recalling this. It was a real snore watching them half-heartedly stab at each other. This was a plot device to slow Jaime down so he couldn’t get to Cersei in time to save her.

Jaime uses his faux hand like a VIP pass. When Jaime can’t get through the gate, he frantically waves his golden hand at the Lannister guards like a D-celeb attempting to get into an Oscar after-party. Like Reese Witherspoon getting arrested or Shannon Doherty trying to get past club bouncers, it was the equivalent of the pathetic, “Don’t you know who I am?!” I was embarrassed for him.

Arya decides not to kill Cersei. After teleporting all the way to Kings Landing—and having Cersei at Numero Uno on her To Kill List for years because Cersei had her dad killed—Arya changes her mind at the last minute. WTF?

Arya dies from lung cancer. During the destruction of KL, Arya gets coated in dust, inhales all the building material residue and will die of mesothelioma. Welcome to Asbesteros!

Jon stands around brooding. Again. Another episode where Jon doesn’t do much but look sad posing in the battlefield in his fake fur, Ikea rug costume.

A horse whisks Aryra away. As if she dialed Uber Horse, a pale horse appears in order for her to flee the Kings Landing BBQ.

Maybe it belonged to the leader of The Golden Army, a man who’s apparent only contribution was to conveniently die so Aryra could get his horse.

 

 

Drogon should get the Iron Throne

Drogon wipes out a fleet, two armies and an entire city in minutes. What did Daenerys Targaryen need the Dothraki, the Unsullied or three dragons for when just one of her dragons can easily lay waste to entire fleets, armies and cities??

Her armies could have all saved the hassle and stayed safely back at Winterfell.

Dany goes mad because Jon Snow/Aegon won’t bang her. His rejection contributes to her “madness” and subsequent roasting of KL. Seriously?

She’s been a married woman, but she doesn’t know men well enough to know all she has to do to get Jon Snow to bang her is to flash some side boob next time they’re together?

She doesn’t know all she has to do to win Jon’s affection is ignore him while looking her usual, Sexy Dragon Lady self and he’d come panting after her declaring his undying love?

Come on, writers. This is more unbelievable than Drogon’s God-like power of destruction.

Dany really broke bad. Although she’s had moments of ruthlessness, and there was a possible cray-cray family gene in her, Dany was still one of “the good guys”. Her people loved and chose her to be their Queen they kept repeating ad nauseum. The Breaker of Chains is now the Barbequer of Innocents.

She’s the worst villain of them all and everyone hates her — after just one episode.

 

Cersei is killed by falling chunks of debris. We’ve been waiting for years for evil rotten Cersei to get hers and she dies in the arms of her brother/lover. Killed by a pile of rocks.

She’s supposed to be so clever, but she didn’t have a back-up plan for escape? Worse, Cersei dies her ignoble death offscreen. We don’t even get to enjoy watching her die.

 

 

 

Add to these the 2 Main Reasons the Season Finale was an Epic Failure:

There was no reason to have Jon Snow be a Targaryen. He doesn’t end up with Drogon. He doesn’t take the Iron Throne as the rightful heir. He rides off into the North. He could have been plain ole Jon Snow with the exact same outcome.

And the most ridiculous, frustrating series ending in television history:

Bran the Boring is chosen for the Iron Wheelchair.

Weirdo Bran —- who isn’t Bran Stark anymore and has made this abundantly clear by acting cold and saying he isn’t Bran, so it’s okay you pushed me out a window to kill me —-  gets chosen. This after smirking, “I live in the past” and “I don’t want anything anymore”.  Right. You don’t want anything but to be king apparently.

 

 

That lame ending ruined the entire series.

Honorable mention for stupidity in story telling:

Aryra didn’t need a horse when she wasn’t leaving KL.

When Edmure Tully makes that speech to the new council, the audience doesn’t have a clue who he is. He’s a minor character who did nothing noteworthy, last time we saw him was Season Six.

And who was the fugly bearded dude sitting next to Yara Greyjoy?? He’s a complete stranger.

More interesting were the bottles of water left under everyone’s chair.

 

UPDATE: As of 6/6/2019 over 1.6 million have signed a petition to get HBO to redo the entire Season 8 with “competent writers”. Sign the petition here: (not that it will do any good)

https://www.change.org/p/hbo-remake-game-of-thrones-season-8-with-competent-writers

 

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1 Response »

  1. Having a dragon is very useful to burning down fleets, armies, and cities, but you’d still need an army to keep the order after the invasion: unlike an army, a dragon can’t be in many places at once.
    Also, if during the invasion the invader uses her dragon to burn the resistance as thoroughly as Dany apparently did, maybe she really wouldn’t need an actual army.

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