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12 Reasons Why Communism Sucks Ass - Staked in the Heart
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Not A Safe Space

12 Reasons Why Communism Sucks Ass

Note that Kelly doesn’t live in a commie country

Kelly Oakes, a liberal Brit who no doubt views Trump as an authoritarian fascist, had this to say on Twitter:


Which is a strange thing to write since there is no point in wanting anything under authoritarian communism because she wouldn’t be able to personally own it. The state owns everything.

Also, under communism: Christmas is canceled.

Young people tweet out pro-commie statements, call themselves “collectivists,” wear Che T-Shirts and ANTIFA carries commie flags. It’s obvious they don’t have a clue what communism actually is.

Let’s have a looksee at what they think is “utopia” and what we urgently need right NOW.

Karl Marx, the parasite. Circa 1865

Communism aka Marxism was conceived by a German Jew named Karl Marx. He refused to get a job. He leeched off his friends and parents his entire life even though he was married with children. Several of his kids died as a result of poverty because their social misfit of a father wouldn’t support them.

What Marx did do was sit on his ass and think about what it would be like to be a “working man”. Marx wrote loftily about poor workers toiling in factories without having ever worked in one. He railed against the “capitalist bourgeoise” business owners who were becoming rich off the backs of the impoverished “proletariat” working class.

All this free time being a couch potato and thinking about working led Marx to come up the idiotic ideology known as communism:

Workers will no longer be exploited by capitalists, there will be no classes in society; land, wealth, property, and industry is equally shared. Everyone lives happily ever after in harmony. All that is required is for the government to own and control absolutely everything after a rousing revolution and presto — utopia!

It sounded great in his head, but in reality communism is a horror show.


The Twelve Reasons Why Communism Sucks Ass


These grinning pro-commie idiots are holding up homicidal psychos. Stalin on the right butchered millions. Che Guevara, in the center, who executed ’round the clock, wanted nuclear war between Russia and America that would destroy the world

1.  Communism isn’t based on reality

This is why every commie country was an epic failure. It isn’t that these countries failed because true communism “has never really been tried,” they weren’t practicing “real” communism, it wasn’t “applied correctly” or the leaders were “corrupt.”

Communism fails because at its root core it is theoretical garbage from the imagination of a pathetic loser who had no idea how the real world operated.

2.  Everyone Must Die

Even Karl Marx admitted that in order to implement an ideology where the government owns and controls everything the people are going to resist. People aren’t going to voluntarily give up their property or land they’ve had in their family for generations or hand over businesses they slaved to create. In order to implement communism, millions of people will be slaughtered until the remainder cave in out of fear.


Do these Russian women in a labor camp look like they think they are in a utopia?

3.  You Could Vanish Into Thin Air

If you’re too outspoken against the government you could find yourself being shot or being sent to a “re-education” camp to be tortured until you’ve recognized the error of your ways. There will be no arrest, no charges, no trial.

You will simply disappear leaving your loved ones to wonder what happened. In communism, any reason to butcher or imprison someone is a good enough reason.

To quote Che Guevara’s excuse for personally killing hundreds of Cubans during and after the communist revolution:

“[To execute]….judicial proof is unnecessary. These procedures are an archaic bourgeois detail.”

What Che is saying that is trials aren’t necessary; they are a quaint, old fashioned idea.

Millions were slaughtered under communism or sent to the gulag for being Christian. Authors were sent away to prison for writing books critical of the government. These were not criminals or “oppressors”.

They were just people.

4.  Forget About Your Spirituality

Don’t even think about crystal healing, aligning your shakras or praying to Jesus for guidance, communism doesn’t allow religion or spirtuality. You are to worship the state and The Dear Leader.

5.  You Will Starve

Once the commie government takes over agriculture from private owners and makes them all “collectives” there is never enough food. People have to use ration cards. A black market develops for things like chocolate. Corruption is rampant.

Mao Zedong’s “Great Leap Forward” killed an estimated 45 million. The Chinese were so hungry they ate all the mammals, birds, lizards, insects, and bark off the trees. In desperation they ate the newly dead.

6.  You Better Keep Your Mouth Shut

There is no such thing as freedom of speech. If you speak out against the commie government or The Great Leader, you will disappear. In a 1989 protest, the Chinese army ran over thousands of protesting college students with tanks.

7.  “All I Want for Christmas is a Bar of Soap”

Forget about personal hygiene. In communism, unlike in capitalism, there is no free market determining what gets made and how much it sells for. “Central Planning” takes control of the production of all products and sets the prices. With millions of items this is an impossible task, even if there wasn’t standard government incompetence. This results in terrible shortages and long lines waiting to get your two rotten turnips. Then you have to go stand in line for one roll of used toilet paper, comrade.

Has someone died in North Korea or is The Dear Leader just constipated?

8.  It’s a Real Buzzkill

From having to fake cry over The Dear Leader when he’s having a stomach ache to not having consistent electricity to no contact with the outside world, it’s a real buzzkill living in a commie country.

Most of the good music, books and movies are banned. The internet is blocked. The TV has two channels and one of them is regurgitating commie propaganda.

Everything is dreary, unreliable and regimented.


Did Stalin timeshare this enormous mansion with people from the working class who supposedly own this property, too? I’m guessing no

9.  You Will Get Nothing and Like It

Communism doesn’t even solve the main problems it was created for, that is, stopping the exploitation of workers and eliminating social classes.

In real world communism, everyone does not share the burden equally. Communism is not the collective ownership of all property since the state owns it and party leaders control it. The wealth is not equally distributed. It does not erase the class struggles. There is always an elite class of asshole party leaders who get all the goodies.

While The People munch on trees and scrounge the countryside for fresh corpses, party leaders dine on tasty fillets and sip fine Champagne in their opulent mansions.

10.  You Must Ask Permission for Everything

Back in the early days of Communist China, in order to get an apartment, get married, or get pregnant, one would have ask their commie supervisor. Now at least they can own a car in China, but they have to ask for permission to buy it. You had to wait for years to get government approval for an apartment in communist Poland.

11.  The Truth Doesn’t Matter

In communism, history books are rewritten and children are taught lies. The only thing that matters is the party dogma. Anyone expressing a differing opinion from that is subject to imprisonment or death.

12.  Communism Goes Against Human Nature

In communism everyone is supposed to share the burden equally (except for the dear party leaders). This is fundamentally flawed because people have unique skill sets, different IQs and levels of laziness. Since everyone is just a worker drone and there is no reward for working hard or being inventive, there is no motivation to do anything. There is no incentive to do more than you have to.

Adding to this not-give-a-shitness attitude from The People is the government’s control of everything. Now you’ve got buffoonery on a massive scale.

The Soviets made tons of bio weapons, like smallpox, the plague, deadly viruses. One time the military was moving anthrax filled barrels through a city when some rolled off and broke open. Of course they did. No one had any incentive to invent barrels that could withstand being dropped. No one was motivated to ensure barrels containing a bio-weapon were tied down properly on the oxen cart. Fortunately, no one got sick — because obviously — anthrax is no good as a weapon when dumped like that.

Evidently, the Soviets weren’t very good at developing bio-weapons because every competent scientist had been killed for saying something that went against party doctrine.

In a Nutshell

Communism is millions of people tortured, killed, imprisoned, starved, choking on their own BO, living in the dark, waiting in line and subsisting on the dead — and it’s boring.




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3 Responses »

  1. This is all very very untrue. Marx wasn’t a no good lazy potato couch. Cite your sources if you would like to get any credibility.

  2. Hi author! Do you happen to have any contact information?

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