Since I started reading women’s online dating profiles, I realize women are clueless about men. I’ve blogged about what men don’t want. This time I’m discussing what they do want.
When you are trying to meet men through online dating, you need to sell yourself, not list your impossible-to-meet requirements. Think about it this way: dating is a competition, and the competition is fierce for the great guys out there. If you want one of them, you’re going to have to work at it.
If you have a bad dating profile or bad attitude, you will be weeding in losers, because decent guys will run the other direction.
- Men like women who want them. Men aren’t challenged by your icy demeanor. They don’t want to be Friendzoned. They want a woman who finds them desirable. I remember reading how one billionaire met his wife. He was a nerd, never married, hadn’t made his fortune yet. He found himself awkwardly standing around at a party, unsure of what to do. Then he saw a woman sitting alone gazing out the window. He got up the courage to approach her, and nervously muttered, “Hi”. She turned to look at him, and with the most brilliant smile, said enthusiastically, “Hi!’ That warm response won his heart. They have been married now for over twenty years.
- Men are old-fashioned. Although there was a sexual revolution for women, men didn’t get the memo. Most men are not so liberal they want a woman who is promiscuous. Men aren’t threatened by your sexual experience, they are disgusted by it. Yes, it’s a double standard. Get over it.
- Men want feminine, soft women. If they wanted strong, independent, competitive, challenging, argumentative, hard-headed, stubborn partners, they could just hang out with their guy friends.
- Know how to take care of a man. This means know how to pamper a man, make him feel cared for, desired, comfortable, masculine, nurtured. This means he is your #1 priority.
- Men want you to share your problems and girlie interests with someone else. Men don’t want to be your counselor. They don’t want to help you “heal,” or “balance” you.
- Do your homework. Research what men want or don’t want. For instance, most men don’t care about a woman’s education. Mentioning your degrees on your profile does nothing for a man. He doesn’t want to bang them. As the late Joan Rivers put it, “No man reached up a woman’s skirt searching for a library card.” How do you do research men? Read some manosphere blogs. Read books by men about men.
- Men are very visual. Physical appearance is important. You don’t have to be a supermodel, but you should keep yourself in shape and have a feminine hairstyle. Sexy clothing helps. Put it this way: men are not masturbating to images of your mind. Give him something to work with.
- Men are sexual.
- Men like their space. Once you have a man’s interest, don’t bombard him with cutsie text messages or phone calls. You don’t have to be his Siamese twin. Let him have time to miss you. A man falls in love with a woman in the space she’s not there. If you insist all this isn’t fair—that is sounds too 1950s—and you aren’t going to cater to any man—fine. Then don’t complain when you find yourself manless surrounded by half empty bags of cat litter.
*This is mostly meant for what not to say in an online dating profile, In other words, if you are strong and independent, don’t say that. Give a man a chance to get to know you before you turn him off.
To read the original “You’re Going to End Up A Crazy Cat Lady” post go here.