You’ve been dating her for awhile, or you’re married, but now you realize you’re just not that into her. There are certain things you must do when you break things off to ensure she doesn’t go all psycho.
After reading guys’ blogs about their scary stalker exes, I realize men don’t know how to make a clean get-away from a woman.
This advice assumes you have had a relationship where you two were committed. (There are different things to do to end it when a relationship isn’t as involved.)
- Remember what the mission is: It is to get away from her smoothly and cleanly. It is to to ensure she doesn’t call, text or pop up somewhere unexpectedly to see you. It is to get rid of her permanently.
Do not let the relationship wind down. Pulling away by cutting down your number of texts, calls or times you see her will not work. She won’t get the hint. You must end things brutally.
Do not waver. Like throwing yourself on a live grenade to save your platoon, this is going to require you to man up. Ending things cleanly means you must be harsh. Do not try to spare her feelings. Keep in mind women are verbal, not action oriented. She must hear you say the words:
“I DON’T LOVE YOU!”
“I WOULD RATHER CUT OFF MY OWN DICK THAN STICK IT INTO YOU!”
“IT IS OVER!”
Do not let her crying detract from the mission (see #1 above). You must get the point across, and tears are inevitable.
If you go soft and waffle, she will think there’s a chance—and hang in there—possibly forever. Never underestimate a woman’s capacity to sustain pain when it comes to a relationship. Once a woman has invested emotionally, she will tolerate anything in the interest of “working things” out. Let me illustrate:
My gf’s husband wanted out of their marriage. He moved to another country, and didn’t give her his phone number. She got his number from me. When she called him, he told her to not call again. Months go by with no word from him. She shows up unexpectedly to his parent’s house for Christmas. He goes nuts, throws her clothes and luggage over the balcony onto the driveway. His stunned parents watch as he physically shoves her out the door, screaming, “Get out of my house!!”
Fast forward a couple months later, she learns he is moving back to the states. She automatically assumes she will be moving with him, and packs her things. He moves without her and files for divorce. Was he leading her on? No. He just wasn’t communicating with her at all.
Sure, he was an asshole. That was his wife and he should have treated her better, filed for divorce sooner, but that wasn’t the point of the story. The point is to show what a woman will endure if she is allowed even the teeniest sliver of hope because a man is not communicating verbally he doesn’t want her.
- Do not under any circumstance have sex with her. You are sending mixed signals and inviting trouble. Repeat: NO SEX.
Do not tell her you want to be “friends.” This word means something different to a woman than it does to a man. To her it will mean you want to hang out, that there’s a possibility you can be a couple again. You cannot leave the door open. You must slam the door in her face.
A main reason women go psycho is that, to them, the guy is sending mixed signals. He’s having sex with her, or hanging out as a friend, and it literally drives a woman crazy. Some of the mixed signaling stems from a guy not wanting to hurt her feelings. He wants to let her down easy. This is the wrong approach to use with many women.
Women will hang in there and try to “fix” the relationship if you let them. You must drill into her head it is over, there is no counseling, no time away together, no sex, no nothing that can fix it. It is OVER.
Warning: This advice won’t help if the woman happens to be a natural born psycho. In that case, you’re just fucked.