A Politically Incorrect Zone

If You’re Over 45—And Want A Man—You’re Going to Have to do Certain Things, Whether You Like it Or Not

The recent “Crazy Cat Lady” blogger got me thinking. (She’s the one who wrote the insanely ridiculous “non-negotiable list” for her next man. My post on that is here.) I guess women have no idea what the reality is for a woman over 45 years old in the dating world. It’s time for a reality check.

Women who are over  45 years old are not a hot commodity.

Men can have any age woman they want—especially successful ones—and they prefer 20-somethings. Rather than have a list of requirements for him, an older woman is going to have to be the accommodating one. Yes, I know that’s not fair.

This means that as an older woman, you’re going to have to work hard to attract a man.  

Let’s start with the basics:

1)   Get real – Accept that the competition is younger, funner and more sexually vibrant than you are.  You need to go the extra mile to compete with this:

This is your competition right here

2)   Weight – Lose it. Men are not attracted to women who look like they could be linebackers for the Miami Dolpins.

3)    Hair – Style it. Don’t just chop it off in some non-style and let it air dry. Get a style. Also men like flowing, longer hair. Get hair extensions. Color your greys. Don’t look like a dried up old hag.

4)   Dress – Be sexy. Work what assets you have. Wear high heels, show some cleavage, show some leg. If you can’t wear high heels, just don’t wear comfy shoes a 90 yr old would. Don’t wear sweat pants unless you got them from Victoria’s Secret. Buy sexy lingerie.

5)   Baggage – Lose it. Men don’t want to hear about how badly your exes treated you, and how you’re going to have a hard time trusting again.

6)   Sex – Learn to like it because men love it. They are with us for sex. If your man likes to watch porn, watch it with him instead of giving him grief when you discover his stash of XXX DVDs under the bed.

7)   Cook – Men love to eat homemade cooking. Learn to make delicious cakes, icing, cookies, and all kinds of yummy dishes. Most men are not vegans; they don’t want to eat tofu burgers. They want Angus beef.

8)    Be quiet – One of the main complaints men have about women is that we yammer too much. Let him get a word in edgewise.

9)    Men are visual – Put effort into your physical appearance. Work out. Get Botox, fillers, facials and anti-cellulite treatments. Take advantage of the high tech anti-aging stuff out there.

10)   Always remember that women need men more than they need us.

Now you can dig your heels in and declare that you aren’t going to do any of these things. You are going to be who you are—by God—and a man can just accept you.

That’s fine.

This is what a man free house and yard looks like

Prepare to die a lonely, bitter old woman, surrounded by hair balls with your house falling apart around you.

See my blog that started this discussion here.

 

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Categorised in: Crazy Cat Lady Collection, General Relationship Advice

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