Online Dating is a Chamber of Horrors Part II

As I described in an earlier post, I signed up for a couple online dating websites, and found it to be bizarre.

One guy sent me a photo where he had carefully erased all around his head, leaving it disembodied and floating in a white sea of nothinginess. I guess he felt he had to protect his ID by eliminating any dead-give-aways in the background. Someone might recognize one of his table lamps, and know it’s him.Another guy sent a photo of himself sleeping with his mouth open, in mid-snore with drool coming out. He claimed to enjoy “bedroom fun”. I guess he was thoughtfully providing a photo of what he looked like seconds after all the “fun” was over.

Important Dating Tip:  If you must share a pic of yourself with potential dates in your natural state, make sure it’s the one where you are hard at work earning a big fat paycheck.

Another guy sent a photo of himself on fire. He was looking for a woman who would participate in these types of “extreme sports” with him, like BASE jumping off bridges and skateboarding the urban jungle.

Yes, when we envision the perfect romantic date with Mr. Right, we have broken teeth, and are on fire.

A lot of the online guys were like that, they had a laundry list of sports and activities their perfect match was going to want to share with them.

Important Dating Tip:  Guys, if you’re looking for someone “athletic” who wants to climb Everest, hunt grizzly bears, kayak, BASE jump, sky dive, snowboard, hang glide, camp in a tent,  and after a hard day of playing, watch the game with a beer—you’re looking for another dude.

Want more online chamber of horrors? Check out Part I.